By Halle Preneta
I lay there with my eyes closed, my brain high on the music running through my earbuds.
This past week had been a trainwreck. From dealing with overwhelming, sometimes debilitating anxiety to processing confusing emotions to juggling school, the musical, and all of my other extracurriculars—it all just came crashing down this week. By the time Saturday rolled around, I wanted nothing to do with life. I just wanted to be alone—not having to think about anything at all, not having to worry about that test that I knew was on Monday, not having to process another thought. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. As much as I love my friends and family, I just needed a moment to myself. And if there were one thing I could always rely on to be there, one thing I knew would help me: it was my music.
The true emotion of the words, the harmonies, the melodies, and how they made me feel so relaxed but also so confident at the same time— Music could make me feel anything. It just surged through my body and had this effect that nothing else really gave me.
I knew just how much it could help people. The words of “Defying Gravity” helped me through depressive episodes. The soft voice of Dodie relaxed me in my anxious moments. The powerhouses of companies from The Prom, Mean Girls, or any musical really, pulled me into another reality. It was the escape from the complexities of the real world that I needed. It gave me a sort of comfort.
I lay there in my state of calm, enjoying every second of not having to worry about anything. A moment of bliss. I could stay in this moment forever.
Eventually, we all have to get up and face reality.
But I didn’t want to do that at the moment. Right then, it was just me and my music facing the world together.